Last Sunday, when faced with 7,000 viewing options, I opted for the title I knew I should watch: Hungry For Change.
I haven't watched Forks Over Knives or Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. I've avoided them. When you've had eating disorders most of your life and view Lean Cuisine frozen pizza, Skinny Cow ice cream and Beck's Premier Light as your only affordable (and guilt-free) vacations from stress, celery is not on your agenda.
However, when you realize that the only thing you ever look forward to Monday–Friday is going to bed because you're perpetually exhausted from 6am-8pm work days and abysmal nutrition? Something needs to change.
So I watched the documentary and, despite fleeting moments of infomercialism, it reached me. It didn't just dish out the old "If you don't love yourself, you'll never stop eating cheesecake." It explained why people who are constantly stressed or depressed have such a hard time driving past Arby's after a horrible day at work. Or—after a GREAT day at work. I finally understood this not just from a serotonin-neuron angle, but a Maslow's hierarchy of needs level. And that was the turning point.
I now have a juicing recipe book, and I'm not making this up—in just the past THREE DAYS that I've started drinking one–two glasses of fruits/veggies a day—I feel like a different person. I have more energy. My digestion is better. My stress levels are down. And my cravings for sugar and dairy and fat are diminishing. THREE DAYS!
I spent $30 less on my weekly grocery shop and bought zero frozen foods. Instead I bought apples, oranges, grapefruit, kiwis, cantaloupe, lemons, strawberries, pears, grapes, raspberries, kale, parsley, cilantro, cucumber, romaine lettuce and fresh ginger.
I'm going to take a picture of my fridge and send it to my mother. She'll be ecstatic.
I'm not in this for weight loss (although I can expect that as a side effect). I'm in it to be alive. I no longer want to "exist" like some poor condemned creature chained inside a pitch black pen. I'm not saying I'll never eat pizza or cheesecake again. I'm just saying I've found my methadone.
And to think, I almost watched Identity Thief that day.
I love this Stevie! I just realized a few days ago that although I am still not doing everything perfectly, my food choices are evolving. Organic and non processed! Kudos to you, keep it up, but don't beat yourself up if you have that pizza or cheesecake!
ReplyDeleteGo Stevie!!! Keep me posted on your progress. I'm very interested to hear how it's going. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteNow you need to get your father to eat a vegetable. I want a picture of THAT. I'm shopping for a NutriBullet. Three days, huh.
ReplyDeleteKT, the fact that my father equates the question "Would you like lettuce on that?" with "Would you like me to take your sandwich and ask a hobo to put it in his pants?" is the entire reason WHY I'm just now learning how to consume veggies. But you know that. Let me know if you like the NutriBullet!
ReplyDeleteThanks, MB! So far the lessons I've learned are: Apple makes everything better. Ginger makes everything taste like Windex. But the adventure has only begun!
ReplyDeleteHey LAindy! It's definitely a process. And just like quitting smoking was for me years and years ago (now), it took me many attempt with healthy eating to get here. And I'm not militant. I had a little Healthy Choice frozen Greek yogurt last night. Just not as a pizza topping :)
ReplyDelete